Ghosts live in Coolidge. Did I get your attention? What does the title have to do with this? How should I know, I just wrote it. But lets stay on topic here. How many people live in or have visited Coolidge? Small number, that's what I thought. Now I bet of those small number, an even smaller number of people know about "Bill." Actually, I don't have the slightest idea what the ghost's name is but Bill definitely has a scary ring to it. I mean really, if you're named Bill you enjoy accounting and live in your parent's house (This statement is not true unless by the off chance that it is true). Another thing, nobody ever wants to get mail from you. But hey, lets get back to the subject matter. Bill is a very real and scary ghoul. He makes you feel like you are being followed, or wakes you up by starring at you in the middle of the night.

But of course, those kinds of things don't exist. Mere superstitions and drafty air conditioning. Right? Left? Why am I asking rhetorical questions? To make things more interesting? To be quixotic? It's just what crazy people want you to believe. They want you to get off subject and make no sense so the Government can deny it! Are you with me?! We must unite and overthrow the current Government! Woah, Woah, Woah, there. Looks Like I took a digression on the off topic train.

Ghost are everywhere! Yea, that's better. I feel as a society, we have not openly addressed the possibility that ghosts are here, and the implications that implies. For example, lets break this one down. Ghost are the number one security threat to the country.


Here's how I reason. Ghosts in the United States have no passport or visa. This means they are illegal aliens. Lets break it down more. Illegal aliens are terrorists. Not only are they terrorists, but as the name implies, they are also aliens. So seriously, instead of fighting terrorists in the Middle East we should be combating the terrorists right beneath our noses. And those are the Alien Ghost Terrorists that are lurking in Coolidge Hall!*^





And yea, blogs are weird. Point proved.


*Taken from the Department of Homeland Security Website.
^Not Really.